I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just like the Real World with babies
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize