dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
He told me they were just razor bumps!
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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