PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize