so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
