Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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