Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
...so i touched it.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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