The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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