Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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