Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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