She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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