Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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