Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Randomize
