Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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