Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Randomize