I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Randomize
