i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Randomize
