Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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