did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
