Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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