I want to make a zoo with you.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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