It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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