so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize
