she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
