After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
