why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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