I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I FOUND THE LEGS
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
