He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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