she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize