Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
