Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize