how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
handjob tips. give me some.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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