i would punch a child for taco bell
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
