i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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