Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
