Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Randomize
