He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
