Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize