The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Randomize
