I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
