Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
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To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
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I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
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