just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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