At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
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After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
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There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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