just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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