Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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