I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize