Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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