areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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