do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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