would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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