I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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