Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks