Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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