Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
